Chairman - Danny Gearing

Danny is our Chairman for 2007/08. He's a local bloke who works in Harold Wood and has a young family and a huge dog.

He always wears that hat.

Who our members are

Vice-Chairman - Stuart King

Unless the members turn against him in April 2008, Stuart will be Chairman. He's a party animal and he's always to be found in the bars in Romford.

Secretary - Richard Playford

This fella runs the club, organising everything from meetings to trips away, from petanque tournaments to karting grands prix. He's Stan Lazaridis.

International Officer - John Maltwood

John organises trips away each year and wow, they are something. This year 16 of us will be ruining France. Hee hee.

Fundraising Officer - John Chaffey

John is, in effect, Santa Claus. He'll be rounding up money from the generous people in the community and we'll make sure it goes to great causes.

Press Officer & Spiderman - Steve Fair

Steve gets us in the paper and on the web. He works in Elm Park and has a fear of commitment, hence his 11 years without marrying his girlfriend.

Layabout member - Graham Fair

Graham hasn't got a job a the club - he's too busy being a jet-setter. That said, he'll end up doing the accounts. He has an alter-ego called Captain Debonair.

Dunnowhathedoes - Andy Bannister

Andy is a top notch fella APART FROM his love of "pink drinks". Rumour has it he has never actually drunk an actual pint of beer.

Layabout member - Tony Brooks

A long-term fixture at the club, Tony makes an excellent Santa..... He's an electrician so he's not easily shocked. Everyone likes Tony.

Treasurer - Ajay Sethi

Ajay is going to keep the finances more than up to date and will easily produce a set of accounts without needing to beg Graham for help.

New member - Antonio Grenho

Our newest member. Antonio is a Portuguese lothario. He has a strong accent and nobody knows what he's talking about.

Community Officer - Kevin Hull

Kevin will be nosing around, looking for good causes for our club to help. He'll be coordinating our Old-Folks trip to Southend and loads of other bits. Busy bloke then.

Special Occasions guy - David Harding

Not one to turn up to any old meeting, we have to lay on champagne, truffles, more champagne and some truffles. Also a red carpet helps.

Sports Officer - Matt Winney

Despite living miles from the club, Matt still organises football, cricket, petanque, karting, pig-racing, snail-bating, and the National Sporting Weekend team.

Spartacus - Andy Liddell

"Lidl" to his friends, this local lawyer is the life and soul of every overseas trip we have. Generous, funny and charming are all words. Nothing to do with him though.

Functions Officer bloke - Steve Collins

Caterham-driving, boat-sailing, business-running, caravan-owning, head-polishing, Doris-loving, pig-racing, Bentley-thrashing, Functions organiser. We love him.

Newbie - Alan Rugless

A plumber and former chef, Alan has mucked up dinners and bathrooms for half of Hornchurch. Like all plumbers, he's rich beyond all belief.

HELLO! - Chris Appleton

Our most successful fisherman and quite the ladies' man (in that he takes 2 hours to get dressed). Chris has one working ear and one display one.